Stuart Taylor

I call myself a comedian… unless I need to impress a client, then I add in “author”.

The things I love most about living in Cape Town are the lack of potholes and the subtle racism.

When out-of-towners come to town, I take them to Groot Constantia for lunch, ’cause if we indulge in the fruits of the vine, the cab ride home is short, so it doesn’t cost the earth; Haiku for the blazing dim sum; comedy evenings at Cape Town Comedy Club (formerly Jou Ma Se Comedy Club), ’cause I get a discount on drinks; Muizenberg beach – we have brekkie at Knead and then just chill on a beach afterwards. The water’s warmer than the Atlantic, so it won’t give you hypothermia.

The best meal I have ever eaten was at Reuben’s in Franschhoek. You have to have a meal prepared by him before you die!

We also love eating the winter menu at 5 Rooms in Constantia – good food, a warm fire and friendly staff. And, I hardly have the pleasure of fine-dining with my kids, we often eat at the Spur – they have the best play areas.

An annual Cape Town event I always participate in is The Big Walk. It’s for a good cause, plus my friend guilt-trips me into hosting it.

My favourite weekend getaway is definitely Montagu – warm springs, rustic vibes, and the brightest stars you can possibly imagine.

On my bucket list to still do in Cape Town is Robben Island. Can you believe I still haven’t been? Disgusting!

The best coffee in Cape Town is from Truth… apparently. But I still prefer Vida, ’cause they’ve got the rewards programme. I also do a blazing coffee at home.

Some of the best walks in Cape Town are in Constantia, which has numerous greenbelts. The family favourite is De Hel just off Southern Cross Drive.

My drink of choice is Spiced Gold and Coke Light – special occasion or not!

I am currently busy prepping for my new show, BeSpoke, which opens at the Baxter on the 22 September and runs until the 3 October.

On Sundays I start with brekkie out with the family and then close the week by having a braai with some friends. After putting the boys to bed, I add some more logs to the fire and then stare at the flames and just breathe.

The Banting diet is a bit extreme, although I’m all for cutting down on carbs and sugar (except Spiced Gold and Coke Light).

Money makes the world go round.

Straight after this, I’m going to bed. (Hopefully you can’t tell from my answers that I’m really tired.)

One day I’m gonna play Madison Square Garden.

The funniest guy in politics is CIA agent, Dr Chester Missing, with our President a close second.

BeSpoke will be running at the Baxter Theatre until 3 October. Read our review.